I am writing to apply for the position of replacing Punxsutawney Phil.
I saw in the news that you think it’s cruel to force Phil the groundhog to work on Feb 2nd instead of hibernating that day. By all means, I wish the Punxsutawney, PA city fathers would be that cruel to me.
A few of my qualifications: I’m furry. I have no problem getting up at the crack of dawn. I cast a shadow. I love historical traditions. I have a really sharp looking top hat so I can match the rest of you fellas. And I’ll be better than a machine—wouldn’t a battery sucking robot be bad for the environment? I’m 100% organic.
Punxsutawney Daryl Punxsutawney Phil
My life would be a lot easier living in a climate controlled environment not worrying about where my next meal was coming from. I can stand working my shadow off one day of the year if all of my other necessities are taken care of on the other 364 days.
Thanks in advance for your consideration
Punxsutawney Daryl –nice ring huh?
P.S. While times are tough, I think it’s cruel to put anyone out of a job by replacing him or her with a robot.